SUGARMUMMYAPP: April 2018

Men — we love them. Like really, really love them. We can’t live without them and we certainly don’t want to. We enjoy all of the little things they do that make them so much hotter. Here are 12 things men do that women really adore.

1. Planning is amazing.

When a man plans, it’s almost as exciting as him proposing. Whether he organizes a date, a weekend trip, an afternoon walk — really, anything — we’re happy. It shows us that you’re capable of putting effort into us and you like it. Actually, you really, really like it.

2. Being a great listener.

Showing a woman that you’re a great listener is oh, so incredible. Remembering things that we mentioned we like is so cool. Whether it’s flowers, a book, chocolates or jewelry, if you surprise us with it, we feel really special!

3. Show us some vulnerability.

It’s extraordinary when a man can openly and honestly talk about his feelings with you. When he’s comfortable doing so, it’s great. It’s so great it’s like winning the emotional lottery.

4. Please us in the bedroom.

When a man can make it happen for you, how elated are you? It’s so exciting it’s almost like winning a tournament. A man who wants to pleasure you, so you really enjoy yourself, well, now that’s how I define a good man. He gets an extra applause if it’s from something he doesn’t ordinarily like doing.

5. Cook for us.

When a man knows his way around the kitchen and is capable and confident, it’s so cute. I’m a sucker for the look on his face when he means business with those vegetables. Cooking takes patience and shows us that you’re cherish-worthy.

6. Let’s go shopping.

Let’s face it, sports are a popular hobby for most men. Well, shopping is a favorite pastime of many women. Shopping is to women what sports is to men. Shopping may not be good for women’s wallets (or their man’s!), and it certainly isn’t cardio, but it absolutely is fun. When a man can shop with you and give his opinion, he’s golden.

7. It’s okay to be nerdy.

Am I the only woman who not so secretly thinks it’s really endearing when a man is curled up on his couch with his book? When he gets all geeked out and excited about something he’s reading and he’s not ashamed of it, it’s pretty adorable.

8. Compromise is key.

How many times has your man done something he doesn’t want to because you asked him to? When a man does something for us that he wouldn’t ordinarily want to do, it makes our hearts melt. Being sweet and thoughtful always goes a long way. We so appreciate you doing something you’re not eager to do.

9. Get all sporty.

It’s nice to see men fired up and passionate about sports. In fact, it’s oddly exciting. When you’re roaring at the TV and getting all riled up — it’s almost erotic. When your eyes light up, you become quite desirable.

10. Kiss and caress us.

Being affectionate and sweet to us goes a long way. When you’re sweet to us — whether you put your arm around us when we’re not expecting it, hold our hand just because, or give us an excited kiss for no reason — our hearts skip a beat.

11. Love our family.

Some people (me included!) have an unusual family. But, your family is your family and so you love them a lot. When your man gets in close with your family and makes all family members love him, he’s extra fabulous.

12. It’s okay to be dominating.

Dominating us makes us sizzle in all the right places. Every woman wants a little Fifty Shades of Grey in her life. There’s a time and a place to make love, and there’s a time and a place to be more aggressive. When you know the difference, you make us swoon.

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After numerous years of collecting stories about the best and worst ways to handle marriage, separation, and divorce, the editors at Divorce Magazine have decided to offer some of their best tips about divorce prevention. These suggestions might help you get to the point where you want to work things out with your current spouse, or they will help you in your next relationship. Either way, this advice is worth the read.

According to DivorceStatistics.org, 40-50 percent of all first-time marriages will end in divorce. And although the reasons vary, some of the top ones include poor communication, financial strain, intimacy issues, built-up resentment, deep-rooted feelings of incompatibility and not being able to forgive.

There’s no question that when there are these types of problems in a marital union, there’s a pressure to find a solution. And sometimes, for one or both spouses, it’s divorce. However, it’s important to remember that while initially divorce may seem like “the answer” to a hurting marriage, it tends to affect spouses, children and society as a whole in a myriad of negative ways.

There’s data to support the fact that divorce can lead to all sorts of psychological and behavioral problems in children; it can also cause them to have relational issues with their parents, siblings and others due to their fear of abandonment. Also, divorce can cause the health of the separated spouses to decrease. Not only that but divorce affects society as a whole. Aside from the fact that divorce costs taxpayers as much as $25,000-30,000, studies indicate that people who are married tend to be far more productive at work than those who come from a broken relationship.

For these reasons and so many others, it’s best to not look at divorce as an answer to a hurting marriage; to instead seek out other solutions to divorce. Here are five of them:

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1. Go for counseling

Out of all of the solutions to divorce that will be shared in this article, this may be the most effective one. Unfortunately, there are a lot of couples who will wait until they feel totally hopeless within their relationship before even considering seeing a professional marriage counselor, but the reality is that it’s healthy for all couples to go at least a couple of times per year. That way, they can get tips and tools to either get viable remedies for the problems they are having or to make their marriage even stronger. Marriage counseling is proven to improve physical and emotional intimacy, increase communication and establish an overall better connection between spouses.

2. Talk about your needs

If one or both of you have problems communicating with one another, that’s just one more reason why it’s such a good idea to see a marriage counselor. But if you do feel like both of you are able to talk and listen pretty well, don’t hesitate to share your needs. Sometimes couples end up resenting each other simply because they feel like their needs are being ignored or they are going unmet. Just because you and your spouse share the same house, that doesn’t mean that you can read one another’s minds. Whatever you’re expecting from the relationship, it’s important that you share it.

3. Spend more quality time together

There are a lot of couples who are not happy in their marriage simply because they don’t feel like they relate to one another anymore. This can happen when things like financial pressures, hectic schedules and their children’s needs take precedence over spending time with one another. Going on dates, taking vacations, making sex a priority in your marriage are not “luxuries”. In order for a marriage to be healthy so that it can last, these are necessities. It’s absolutely imperative that you and your spouse spend quality time with one another.

4. Get some accountability

Although your spouse should be your main accountability partner, also look for some other married couples who can help to hold you accountable as well. Accountable to what? Accountable to the vows that you took on your wedding day. Everyone needs friends and mentors who can serve as a support system and this is especially the case when it comes to married people. Sometimes couples see divorce as their only solution because they don’t have others around them to remind them that there are other solutions to divorce; ones that usually prove to be far better.

5. Accept that your spouse is human—just like you

Yes, on the surface, you know that your husband or wife is human. But here’s the thing: When you think about all of the things that frustrate you, there’s a pretty good chance that it’s about them not being who you want and/or expect them to be. Humans are flawed and they make mistakes. But the more than you accept that as a reality, the more open you’ll be to not being upset with your spouse when they disappoint you; the more willing you will be to give them what you want in return when you fall short: patience, forgiveness, understanding, encouragement and love. Yes, the more willing you are to give what you want in your marriage, the more of a chance it has not only to avoid divorce but to truly thrive!

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1. Go for counseling

2. Talk about your needs

3. Spend more quality time together

4. Get some accountability

5. Accept that your spouse is human—just like you

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